Monday Mish-Mash QOTD: He did what to her what with his what?

Happy Monday, everyone. (Yes, I know that's an oxymoron for most of us...) Hope if you're in the US you got your taxes/extension filed.

Today's question of the day: I know language is subjective, but what's the worst thing you've ever seen male and/or female genitalia called in a romance/erotica book?

Feel free to chime in below. :)